We have done everything. You are on the bus, have a quiet time with your child, and another child starts kicking off. Screaming. Flailing about. You know it may be as easy as your own child, but there is this volatile thought: is it because she does not discipline her child correctly?
Maybe that's not the example but something else. The reason that a child is a "careful eater" or does not sleep well. We are so quick to blame the mother. She must do something wrong. There is clearly a solution, she has not found it.
But how are you when you are mom? When it's your kid who has a mega-melting in the supermarket or refuses to get into the buggy. When you become a mother with spooled cheeks, do you feel cheeky, who is looking at others and judging?
It's the moment you think, "What in the world can I do to fix this?" And "I will never judge another mother again". This is not my fault. When her child is in pain It's not necessarily her fault.
And since today I had a wonderful exchange with a local guy. He owns a store that I often pass by and we have become a pals; We have small chats. He is also a father of two young children. He has seen my children cry, grump, tantrum – but he has never said anything. He only gives an understanding smile.
While I had a coffee this morning, my son sat calmly on my knee. At first he drank his milk, but when he finished he stopped. Just sitting and watching people pass by. And the business owner came over and said, "Your son is as calm as you and your husband."
It was a lovely compliment. And he did not have to say that. He could only have observed, and then continued. But he did not. He realized that there is so much power in a positive judgment and he would take time to give me a slight increase.
We are all quick to find fault and give them, but what all mothers need is support when things go wrong and praise when things go right. Instead of judging another mother for her child's behavior, ask if she needs help. And when her children collaborate, or are polite, tell her.
Do you take time to compliment other mothers with their parenting? Scroll down to comment.